In this episode, personality hackers and smart couple Joel and Antonia share their personal experiences of working through differences by understanding their partner’s personality type. These two use Myers-Briggs, the enneagram, and other personality tests to understand themselves and each other better. I think you’ll get a couple of new insights from Joel and Antonia’s story that can help you right now in your own relationship. Pay special attention to what they do well and how they work through challenges in a collaborative way.
SHOWNOTES
What is a “social technology”? [8:30]
Why do you need to understand your partner’s personality style? [14:00]
How did Joel and Antonia start studying personality? [15:15]
The unique history of the Myers-Briggs typing system. [17:00]
How thinkers and feelers can work well in relationships. [22:00]
Can your learn from your partner’s personality style? [32:00]
The impact of masculine or feminine personality types. [35:00]
The two kinds of thinking styles. [38:30]
The best place to start to figure out you & your partner’s personality type? [42:00]
The traps of personality tests. [44:00]
One thing to never do with your partner. [47:30]
What caused Joel and Antonia to dive into personal growth? [49:00]
The new Smart Couple logo design tweak by Steve Srotir—Steve says, “I’m inspired to work for clients who elevate the human experience, stimulate action and spark imaginations – creating impact by design.” Contact: [email protected] | LinkedIn – Steve Srotir
GUEST BIO
Joel Mark Witt & Antonia Dodge are a married couple and creators of PersonalityHacker – a new kind of publishing company that merges digital media with emerging models of human development. They focus on helping people create more happiness in their lives by understanding themselves and others.
In this episode, we tackle spirituality and relationships with soulshaping mentor Jeff Brown. Jeff has a great knack for calling BS on the spiritual movement and instead offering grounded, practical, embodied suggestions and pathways to continue to deepen into our wholeness. This one may get uncomfortable depending on where you fall in this conversation. It is my wish that you feel challenged and grow from it.
SHOWNOTES
What is Soulshaping? [12:40]
What are the most common human struggles that Jeff sees in his work? [14:00]
Why most people meditate and so “solo spirituality” over relationships. [16:30]
Jeff’s personal definition of spirituality [18:00]
How are some teachings distorting the ideas of spirituality and emotions? [19:30]
What can men do to grow spiritually? [24:00]
The lesson Jeff learned from selling windows door-to-door. [27:00]
How can women help men awaken? [29:30]
How do Jeff and partner navigate conflict in their relationship? [32:45]
Jeff gives his opinion on polyamory. [38:00]
What are Jeff’s preferred practices for personal growth? [39:45]
A former criminal lawyer and psychotherapist, Jeff Brown is the author of 5 popular books- Soulshaping: A Journey of Self-Creation, Ascending with Both Feet on the Ground, Love it Forward, An Uncommon Bond, & Spiritual Graffiti. He is the producer and key journeyer in the award-winning spiritual documentary, Karmageddon, which also stars Ram Dass & Seane Corn. He is also the owner of Enrealment Press and an online school, Soulshaping Institute. A very popular presence in social media, Jeff lives in Toronto with his partner, poet Susan Frybort.
You’ve been a with a friend or partner who rambles on right? And, you check out or stop listening, but you let them talk right? We’ve all been there. Well, in this episode, we discuss how important it is to interrupt them and take command of the conversation. Wait, Am I suggesting you get aggressive? No way. I’m asking that you show your “care” for them by listening in an entirely different way.
SHOWNOTES
What is “captive audience”? [7:30]
Who is responsible when someone talks too much in an interaction? [10:30]
What is active listening? [12:15]
The gift that you might be giving the “over-talker”. [14:00]
Jayson gives some examples on how to interrupt. [15:30]
Jayson shares a personal story of a dude that talked WAY too much and what Jayson did about it. [21:30]
Feeling disconnected is a common experience in long-term relationships. The question is how to get reconnected? Well, first you’ll want to start to identify the ways in which you disconnect and locate the source. After some self-inquiry there, you can learn how to reconnect to you, and your partner. Listen to this one to learn how.
SHOWNOTES
Should you expect that your marriage will last forever? [4:00]
Do you need to love yourself first before you get into a relationship? [5:30]
The 10 signs that you’re disconnected from yourself. [9:30]
Do men change? Can they overcome their blocks? Of course. But sometimes, they need a little permission or a nudge from another man. I’m always thrilled to meet men who help other men come out of their conditioning. This week, I interview Connor Beaton, who is doing just that through his ManTalks events. Check it out.
SHOWNOTES
What is ManTalks? [9:00]
The rock bottom that Connor experienced that caused him to shift his life. [10:30]
The two options that Connor chose between. [18:00]
How traditional masculinity is a pitfall for many men. [22:00]
What does Connor see as the main challenge for men in relationships? [24:30]
The unique role of women and personal growth. [26:00]
Some the things that make men’s work not as accessible to most men. [28:00]
Do you want more connection while your partner wants more space? One of the most common issues in a partnership is the distancer/pursuer dynamic. In the second of our two-part series, Ellen and I help the distancers understand and deal with your pursuing partner.
SHOWNOTES
What does it mean to the distancer with a pursuer partner? [7:00]
Is the pursuer really being needy when they want attention from a distancer? [10:00]
The link between a pursuer and their childhood relationship with their caregiver. [12:30]
A better way to ask for space. [15:00]
Why the pursuer can be an MVP in a long-term relationship. [19:30]
Joel Mark Witt & Antonia Dodge are a married couple and creators of Personality Hacker – a new kind of publishing company that merges digital media with emerging models of human development. They focus on helping people create more happiness in their lives by understanding themselves and others.
