Richelle Ludwig

My non-linear journey to relational development began with recovering from an eating disorder. I began to understand the behaviours of my ED as strategies and attempts to regulate my inner state. Over time I saw the behaviours dissipate as I developed other strategies that were connecting, learned how to feel my feelings and changed my relationship to myself.

Along the way, I inevitably came to relationships. I started to see that a lot of personal-development was feeding into my hyper-independence and avoidant attachment, contributing to a lot of bypassing. Many of my strategies developed as ways to deal with feelings that arose in interpersonal relationships. Growing up painfully shy, introverted and tending towards an avoidant attachment style didn’t make relationships feel easy. Yet, I could feel that I deeply desired connection with others. I worked with my first relationship coach in 2018 and over the years my inner sense of security has grown and alongside it, the capacity for more intimacy in all my relationships.

In 2021 my mom passed away and this deepened my desire and commitment to relational development. I saw the way my siblings and I came together to support my mom in her final months. Death is a liminal space where all the fluff and distractions fall away. Only what’s most important is left and for me that was relationships. We are after all, relational beings wired for connection. It’s just that many of us didn’t learn how to relate in healthy ways. I feel passionate about supporting others in their journey to relational wellbeing.