Is it your partner’s job to meet your needs? Find out in this short episode…
Question: I’d love to hear more about the possible distinction between standing in one’s own needs and then the problematic zone of asking or expecting a partner to change. Asking for change in certain areas seems reasonable and I use my own potential reaction to being asked to change as a measure: “Would I respond well to my partner asking me to change in this area?”
But some areas seem tricky, such as Love Languages: “XYZ behaviour that is hard for you is actually what most supports me feeling loved and seen” etc. Could you speak to this?
- Asking for what you need [6:00]
- Meeting your partner’s needs is win-win [9:00]
- If our primary partnership is unsafe [11:00]
- Knowing your partner’s needs before they ask [13:00]
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I need to be spoken too and listened to in the right way.
hi suzanne, I hope that you feel spoken to and listened to with respect, and I’m reminded of Gandhi’s famous quote “be the chance you want to see in the world” and know that if you have continued to listened to this podcast you’ll gain a lot of tools to become more relationally fluent in how you communicate, and can hopefully role model that to your partner if you aren’t already. Thanks for listening and commenting =)