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The 3 Types Of Marriages

Most couples don’t know why they continue to struggle over time or even what the source of their problems are…

Yet, one of the most common and detrimental misfires a couple has right from the start is not having the proper framework.

There are perhaps thousands of different “types” of marriages out there, and most rely on frameworks that are bankrupt.

But there’s only one framework (seriously, only one) that will give you long-term, mutually empowered marriage success.

And before we dive into that bulletproof framework, you need to understand three of the most common types of marriages people are in.

Knowing which camp you are in will help determine if you will succeed, frustrate, or fail.

This is key advice for newlyweds or folks about to get married. This information is also designed to educate married couples, helping you determine if you are going to go deeper, stay just “roommates” over time, or part ways in a painful divorce, and you may as well if you don’t choose wisely.

Another way to look at the 3 types of (more…)

The Main Goal Of A High-Functioning Marriage

Why did you get married? Or if you are not married, why bother? What is the point? (I asked this on facebook recently and got about 200 responses that were all over the place) Does it really matter? These are all very important questions I asked myself when I publicly stated over and over, “I’ll never get married, ever.” If most businesses are set up to maximize profits while serving an ever-greater number of people, what then is the goal of a marriage? We can answer this important question using the business metaphor. Notice how the business example has two components, serving self (profits), and serving other (solving a problem the consumer needs). So, let’s build on that. For most people the goal of marriage is to be happy. While I understand that, it’s an impossible

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How Your Tone Of Voice Can Help or Hurt Your Marriage

Couples fight about this one a lot.

“You’re using that tone with me again.”

“No I’m not.”

“Yes you are.”

“All I said was ___________, Geez, why are you overreacting?”

You know this one right?

When it comes to long-term partnership, tone of voice is a big deal.

The most subtle of tones can be like (more…)

How to Create Healthy Expectations In A Marriage

When is it okay to have expectations in your marriage? What is an example of an expectation I can have without setting my spouse up for a resentment?

I remember when I first met my wife, I “expected” her to be a climber/skier, like me. This led to a lot of fights and a lot of suffering. She felt judged. I felt resentful.

Most of us do this to some degree, that is, until we get clear on our realistic and honorable expectations and let go of the rest.

Here’s a few short comments on the subject along with what NOT (more…)

4 Things to Do if Your Marriage is Stuck, Flat, or Drifting

I see it all the time: Married couples who are withering away, married after many years but are simply pals, buddies, roommates. A long-term partnership gone stale. Newlyweds who get stuck in the weeds (wounds) after the honeymoon wears off and have no tools to move forward. New parents, who after a few years of marriage, begin to drift due to the demands of children. An affair, after kids, a stagnating connection, and the absence of sex. And, on and on…

It’s all normal and understandable.

But folks, it doesn’t have to stay like this. Marriage and parenting are designed to get at the deepest of (more…)