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AMA: Healing Attachment Wounds, Codependency & Happy Wife Happy Life – Jayson & Ellen – 433

By Jayson
February 7, 2023




Curtis asks, “In your expertise, do you perceive that attachment wounds and attachment styles are healed and transformed during partnership or outside of that? I’m curious to hear your thoughts because I’ve been doing a bit of research and finding different takes on it…”

Another listener wonders if these phrases signal a lack of personal responsibility in a codependent relationship: “‘I can only feel okay when she (or he) is feeling okay,’ ‘I feel I need to make her (or him) happy,’ and ‘Happy wife, happy life’; how would an attachment framework view codependency?”. 

Ellen and Jayson address how we can heal our attachment wounds/adapt our attachment styles, highlight how we impact one another, and discuss the importance of finding common ground to propel the relationship forward. Stay tuned to the end for your action steps.



  1. Cristina

    Curious some ways to co-create. I did grow up in an independent home and think I may seem controlling sometimes. When I have a need it’s hard to ask for connection… I try and anticipate partner needs to be caring. What are some questions to open each other to co creating?

    • meg@relationshipschool.com

      hey Cristina, I will pass your question over to Jayson and stay tuned it may just make for a future AMA podcast episode =) In the meantime I’d recommend checking out relationshipschool.com/upgrade for some tools to support growth with your partner. Take care and thanks for listening.


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